“You’re doing something out of the ordinary. This is something that will be glaringly obvious. You’ll stick out like a sore thumb.”
The quickest way to become mediocre is by following the advice of mediocre people.
Many of these people are well-intentioned. But most of the time their advice doesn’t speak to the potential of you becoming the strongest version of yourself.
These people will attempt to poison drip you with advice that only appeals to your lowest common denominator.
They’ll give you advice bereft of anything of sustenance then tell you:
“I’m just looking out for you. I just want to make sure that you succeed, you have a bright future ahead of you.”
What they really want to say is:
“You are putting in an obnoxious amount of work. You’re reminding me of my lazy existence.”
I came to a disturbing realization about someone close to me last year. This person has been putting on, acting like they’re rich.
Flexing for the gram, showing off, etc was only a cry for help that he would soon need when he couldn’t keep up the façade any longer.
Countless times in the past I’ve asked this person for business advice seeing as he did have quite a run in the entrepreneurship realm. Nevertheless, he would brush me off or straight up ignore my questions.
But at the same time, in passing, when we would have conversation, he would give me unsolicited advice that would flat out not be in my best interests.
This is a prime example of people who don’t want you to do good or if they’re family, they’ll want you to do good but not better than them.
So who do you seek advice from?
You seek advice from people who walk the walk.
People who have skin in the game and aren’t delusional about their current standing.
This person is honest about who they are. They have a level of self-awareness that allows for them to help others in a meaningful way because they know what they were put here on this planet to give.
And here’s something that I just grasped: good advice is always in opposition to popular advice.
Understand that when you ask for advice from normies. People that are normal, popular and have done a good job with fitting in, you’re asking how to be ordinary.
This goes for all kinds of pursuits.
I see this in the fitness world all the time. Someone on social media asks how to gain or lose weight and here comes the “experts” giving them the wrong information. Individuals who don’t even look like they lift are giving advice on fitness.
Typically, the person asking is glad because they got the answer they wanted to hear. An answer that is easy, accessible and doesn’t work. That way they can maintain their identity of failure.
You see, many people don’t want REAL advice. They want to be told what they want to hear.
Real fitness advice moves along the lines of basic nutritional and training fundamentals like counting calories(calories in vs calories out), progressive overload, deloads, etc.
This is OPPOSITE of the over emphasis on supplements, fit tea and garbage nutritional shakes.
When people like this get the wrong advice, they are thankful they get to maintain their illusion of failure.
Now if you want real advice, take it from the people who live life on their own terms, whatever that may be. This advice diverges from the general consensus.
One such guy is “Gary Vaynerchuk.” He gives the exact opposite advice of the general consensus. Advice such as not going to college because it’s a waste of time, such as not buying things you don’t need nor can afford. He is the physical manifestation of the middle finger to the general consensus. This is why he’s a winner.
But here’s the catch, when you take advice from the unpopular or the guy like Gary who’s different, be ready to be outcasted by your friends and family.
You’re doing something out of the ordinary. This is something that will be glaringly obvious. You’ll stick out like a sore thumb.
You will walk different, speak different.
Your interests will change.
They will put tons of pressure on you to conform again. They’ll mock you. Chastise you. They’ll try to break you at every turn.
When I started to take unpopular advice, this is exactly what happened to me.
Friends who I use to hang with on the regular started to leave me out of everything. They go on trips without inviting me, talk behind my back, you name it.
But this is all part of the game.
What are you going to do?
a) Self pity yourself and cry about it.
b) Become psychologically invincible.
If you’re a true Warrior for winning at heart, you’ll ignore them and choose “b” every single time.
You have to understand, and this took me some time to learn, that you have to develop thick skin.
One way to do this is to learn everything you can about human nature.
After hours of reading up on human nature, I no longer take things personally.
It’s just a product of human nature.
In order to be invincible you have to build and maintain a protective shield around your mind and emotions. Don’t allow others to plant seeds of doubt that will sprout into thoughts that sabotage your efforts. An unguarded mind is like a guard that will soon be over run by weeds.
Inside your head is your intricate blueprint laid out only for YOUR eyes.
This means your friends and family, including mommy, daddy, your girlfriend, cat and dog don’t even have access to your blueprint.
I’ve been guilty of telling people my plans. It only serves to suck the life out of them because people will try to downplay it.
But I learned to keep my true plan in my head. It’s memorized. I know it back and front and it’s only for my eyes.
When you run your big mouth about your plan they’ll get jealous, as they should, and will try to talk you out of it.
This is where they plant those seeds of doubt. Then, believe this or not, you start to think you don’t have it in you to accomplish your goals.
When you’re invincible, you’re reticent. You keep it to yourself. People who are malleable will listen to the naysaying, lower mindset losers. The invincible won’t even hear a word they’ve said.
Your success has to be 100% on your own terms. No one else has say or input.
They’re going to try to talk down to you, they’ll try to play you, they will try to embarrass you in front of people so as to seem above you in status. Ignore all of it.
If you are hurt by it at all don’t even give them the satisfaction of knowing. Don’t let it break you.
They’re only trying to break you down like they’ve been broken down by someone toxic in their past.
They were convinced to go the normie route now they’re kicking themselves for doing so.
Anyone else who’s getting after it reminds them of their dream deferred, hence their toxicity.
How To Become Invincible By Boosting Your Self Esteem
If you’re having trouble getting out from under someone’s toxic grip, you have to question your self-esteem.
You more than likely have an inferiority complex. Or you might be under the influence of a narcissist.
Either way, you need to rebuild the way you view yourself.
Either you view yourself as worthy or unworthy of achieving your goals.
Either you’re inferior or superior to your current self image. Fix it.
How do you fix it? By doing the work. You become superior by thinking superior thoughts.
You think thoughts that are elevated above the gradient of your current self image.
Are you a pushover? Think of what it would be like to have a spine.
Are you a sub-clinical anxious mess? Think of what it would be like to be stoic in the face of any circumstances that befall you.
All you have to do is elevate your mind by thinking superior thoughts. The physical manifestation will follow.
Understand there’s a dichotomy at work here. The dichotomy of good and bad. Either you get good or you stay bad.
And no. You’re not “good the way you are.” You have to work yourself into what you want to be.
You have the power to remold yourself into something much better than you currently are.
Establish a plan of action. Work it until it comes into fruition obsessively. Don’t let ANYTHING get in your way.
I use to be that hot-headed individual who would let any and everything bother me. If you are as weak willed as I use to be, you should be working overtime to change that.
Here’s a stoic piece of advice: focus on the things you can control and leave the things you can’t control alone. Focus your energy on the things that you can get better at.
You can always get better at your craft. Controlling the thoughts of your mind is another discipline you can put to work. Shifting your paradigms to navigate your current set of circumstances is something you can work on.
You can also read more books to continuous learn.
Whatever you can’t change, leave it alone. Don’t complain about it.
Your negative family and friends won’t change. Those people won’t change but you can.
When you get to the point where people call you broken, unemotional or whatever poo-poo psychological disorder they choose to try to diagnose you with, then you will truly know that you’ve become psychologically invincible.
Name calling from the naysayers is their last ditch effort to pull you back into the fold.
At the end of the day which do you want to inspire? Intrigue or repulsion?
You want to become uncommon amongst uncommon people. In order to do this you must ignore and abhor mediocrity in yourself.
Here’s an affirmation I say to myself everyday: “I am psychologically impenetrable.”
I’ve been saying this for 8 years. Everyday. Once upon a time it was a necessity for survival. I was surrounded by many people who wanted the worst for me.
I had to rise into a greater version of myself to make it through.
Become psychologically unbreakable in every way by putting your self betterment first.