Happiness Is A Choice

When it comes to happiness, it is not tied to anything tangible. It is a choice we make in the way we think. Happiness is also a function of the thoughts we think.

Credit: Austin Schmid, Unsplash

They think that if they get what they want then happiness will come. They think that if they get the partner they want then they will be happy.

This if-then attitude towards happiness is precisely the reason why many aren’t happy.

This is something that I realized through a meditation session I had this morning.

So how do we achieve happiness? We CHOOSE to be happy.

Simple enough right?

Happiness Is A Choice

“People these days actually chase after things that make them feel like shit, shows that are filled with violence, drama, sadness.”

I can hear some of you screaming at the screen right now. I can also hear some of you clicking off this article but I am a firm believer in this.

Happiness is a choice
Credit: Eye For Ebony, Unsplash

You can choose to be happy.

Many people do not realize the power of choice they have. They think that happiness is just by chance.

When you choose to consume things that make you feel violent, unstable and sad, happiness is far from your reach.

How in the world are you suppose to achieve happiness when you consume these things?

Either way, it’s a choice.

I know people who consume so much news that they think that the world is a bad place on a wholesale level.

I’ve been off of social media going on 22 days now. And when I go outside, the world seems fine to me.

Is this ignorance? Maybe. But you know what they say about ignorance.

Besides, what the hell can I do about issues I see on a screen—issues I have no control over.

If you really think that happiness isn’t a choice, try choosing to turn the screens off. See how that effects your mood.

You Choose Your Thoughts, You Choose Your Mood

When you choose happiness you acknowledge the Power of God.
Credit: Jared Rice, Unsplash

“…you have to slowly ascend by picking better vibrations each step of the way.”

While meditating, all sorts of thoughts pops into your head.

“Did you turn the stove off?”

“What will I do with my life? I’m a loser.”

Why didn’t I choose the red one, I hate blue!”

“I need to make more money!”

So many nonsense thoughts pops comes and goes but it is up to YOU to entertain them or not. That is the key to happiness. Choice.

Thoughts are like visitors at your home.

They can come knocking but you don’t have to let them in.

If you do let them in, make sure that these visitors are welcomed. That they are visitors that you like to frequently hear from.

You ever had someone unwelcome come over to your place. You let them in and as soon as you do you regret it?

What makes it worse is that they are hard to get rid of once they are inside your cozy home. They raid your fridge, eat up all your food, drink up all your liquor. They use the bathroom, don’t flush or wash their hands—these people are akin to the negative thoughts you let in.

We seem to have an evolutionary affinity to negativity bias.

It seems as if we always expect the worse. We entertain negative thought forms more readily than we do positivity.

Do you want to be happy?

Choose thoughts that encourage your upwards trajectory to happiness. That’s it.

It is a tough exercise. But you can do it.

Start with the simple, positive thoughts. Start with your favorite food.

Visualize yourself eating your favorite meal. How does it taste? What is the texture? Hold that thought. Then move to a better feeling thought, whatever it may be. Then you keep going.

We can move up the emotional guidance scale toward happiness by choosing our thoughts.
http://www.martineouellet.org/emotional-ladder/

The focus is to ascend the ladder of your emotions moving from: Fear, Grief, Depression, Despair, Powerlessness to Joy, Passion, Empowerment, Love, Freedom, Appreciation

You want to choose thoughts that corresponds to each of these colors until you reach pink.

Do not try to go from fear to enthusiasm all in one jump, you have to slowly ascend by picking better vibrations each step of the way.

Avoid Unhappy And Negative People At All Costs

…we are like sponges. When we hang around people, we soak up their energy via osmosis.”

We soak up our environmental energy, including happiness if there is any around.
Osmosis
Noun
1. a process by which molecules of a solvent tend to pass through a semipermeable member from a less concentrated solution into a more concentrated one, thus equalizing the concentrations on each side of the membrane.

2. the process of gradual or unconscious assimilation of ideas, knowledge, etc.

If you are serious about choosing happiness, you have to choose your friends accordingly.

You have to choose the people you hang around accordingly as well.

You ever heard of the phrase “Birds of a feather flock together.”

Or

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time around?”

We have to form bonds that are conducive to our happiness. Be selfish about it too. Even if it means staying away from toxic family.

“The Blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.”

I forgot
Happiness is choosing to love one another.
Credit: Larm Rmah, Unsplash

See, we are like sponges. When we hang around people, we soak up their energy via osmosis.

We have our conscious minds, the semipermeable membrane and the subconscious which is the other side where WE, our SELF resides.

When we hang around people whether they are negative or positive, we unconsciously soak up who they are though osmosis. And there is nothing you can do to stop it.

“You may think you are being a “good friend” by staying loyal to someone who is damaging by way of toxic conversation (complaining, gossiping, being negative) but all you’re doing is massaging the IV bag of toxicity connected to your own arm.”

I use to work for a company where toxicity was abound everyday.

This place consisted of some not so nice people throughout all layers of the company.

Over the years I transformed into someone who was rough around the edges for no good reason at all.

Prior to working there, I had a much more positive outlook on life in regards to they way I conducted my mentality.

Once I was separated, I started to “get my mind back.”

Although I was transformed into one of “those people” on the outside, I have managed to keep my “essence” and begun the detoxification process via positive messages being fed to my mind every day.

This is the power of osmosis.

You may think you are being a “good friend” by staying loyal to someone who is damaging by way of toxic conversation (complaining, gossiping, being negative) but all you’re doing is massaging the IV bag of toxicity connected to your own arm.

Circumstances Are Inconsequential To Your Happiness

“We have to ignore circumstances. We have to ignore the hard times in order to place our focus on the life we want to lead.”

There is nothing more insignificant when it comes to your happiness than circumstances.

Circumstances spring from your mind.

Now, if you have thought yourself into a really bad situation then it helps if someone were able to pull you out in order for you to recover. But this must be done under a watchful eye.

Similar to rehabilitation centers. The purpose of being pulled out of an environment such as the one a client was previous in, is to allow complete healing independently of the environment.

In other words, we can’t heal in the same environment that made us sick.

But going back to my point of circumstances being a product of your mind, was it the environment that made us sick or was it our thoughts that made us sick?

For now I’ll chalk it up to a quasi-feedback loop, a recycling of toxicity but in otherwise manageable circumstances, one can think and will their way “out.”

How do we do this? How do we get “out” of circumstances that we don’t belong in?

We have to ignore circumstances. We have to ignore the hard times in order to place our focus on the life we want to lead.

The subconscious mind is a beautiful thing. It cannot tell the difference between the images we perceive with our physical eye or our mind’s eye.

When we are in circumstances that are not to our liking, we simply have to close our eyes and visualize one that we would like to be in BUT we HAVE to take sufficient action toward these images.

This isn’t “the secret.”

Luckily, the subconscious mind is connected to something called the “Reticular Activation System” or the RAS.

The RAS is basically “what you look for you will find.” If you imprint onto your subconscious an image of something, your mind will find a way to get it. It will take unconscious, actionable steps toward that goal.

This is why happiness is not determined by your circumstances.

If you resonate with a specific image in your mind’s that brings you joy, you don’t need your current circumstances at all.

Choose Gratitude For Happiness

“I’m not going to tell you what to be grateful for but there is always something, trust me—just look around.”

This is the forcd that pulls everything together, gratitude.

Gratitude is the substance that pulls more of the same. If you are grateful for all the good that came into your life, more of the same will come.

It is as simple as this.

When you are happy for what you have, more happiness comes your way. But if you are ungrateful and take everything for granted, you will be like the person who is glutinous, eats but is never full. This person is never satisfied no matter how good they have it in life.

Choosing gratitude means you are in a consistent state of happiness because you realize that you are blessed no matter the circumstances.

No matter the circumstances, you always have something to be thankful for.

You can always go into a rage of appreciation when you are starting to feel down.

I’m not going to tell you what to be grateful for but there is always something, trust me—just look around.

Disclaimer

Look, there’s going to be someone who reads this and finds the negative in it someway, somehow.

I’m not here for that. I’m not saying that all someone needs to do is read the words above and “boom, cured.”

This article is for people who can find gems in it that can help them be happy. That can help them progress in life.

If you have been diagnosed with depression or any other mentally related challenges, I suggest that you seek the help you need. Sometimes we need a little help to nudge us in the right direction.

I hope that these words can help someone who is struggling in anyway to reach the levels of happiness they seek.

Your friend,

-Anthony Boyd

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