Do People Want You To Be Successful?

As far back as I can remember, I’ve always been passionate about evolution in one form or another. Success has always been an obsession of mine. Whether it was physically, mentally or emotionally, I have always been driven to become a better version of myself in perpetuity.

I’ve never been the type to sit still for too long. Not in the restless sort of way but in such a way that I was always onto the next thing. Learning new things, improving skills and thinking about my next move.

During this time I’ve had acquaintances come and go. Until now, I haven’t really sat down to give it much thought. That is until I was watching a YouTuber by the name of MaryJane Bryam.

Mary Jane is a fearless woman who travels the world striving to hit her goal of visiting 100 countries, I believe she hit that number by now.

She’s visited Egypt, Ethiopia, India, China, Tokyo, Colombia, the list goes on for what seems like forever.

Initially, I started watching her YouTube to get ideas about how to create my own YouTube presence.

Along the way I’ve grown to like her channel, so much so that I’ve consumed a good portion of her content including a video talking about how much it costs to live in paris.

In the comment section of this video, people give her props for being able to get to a level where she can afford to live in Paris as well as the natives disputing her claim that Paris would cost $7000 per month to live there comfortably.

There’s also the comments that come off as if they are “haters.” One of which states something to the effect that MJ should stay “relatable” and “to stop posting about her fancy life in Paris”(paraphrasing).

From my point of view this comes off as pure jealousy. But why?

I was watching her earlier videos and I’ve seen how she’s evolved. It seems as though the more she evolved, the more snarky some of the comments got in nature, particularly comments that inquired and commented on her success.

Which brought me to the question, do others want you to be successful?

What about success turns people into haters? I’ve heard phrases such as “stay relatable” when I started strength training and gaining weight, co-workers explicitly attempted to place limitations on my growth by saying “you don’t need to get any bigger, stay just like that.”

It seems as though me going from a 145lb weakling to a 200lb powerhouse intimidated my peers but I was too busying working hard to analyze this phenomenon.

So I state the question again, Do others want you to be successful?

Well the answer would be “no.”

They Are Married To A Previous Version Of You

When we first start any pursuit, we begin as a lackluster, fresh faced beginner. We are the raw material of what will later become a more polished, reformed version of the person we want to be.

It is in this very state that people admire us the most because we most resemble themselves. Actually quite uninspiring, really.

Boudewijn Huysmans Via Unsplash

This version of ourselves are familiar to them. We are the most unassuming in this form.

People are drawn to who they have rapport with. It is this very reason why people do not want us to become successful because it means we have changed. People don’t like change.

It’s as simple as this. Many times they don’t know that is is the reason for their angst. Some people know. And then there are the people who know but then go a step further to try to rationalize their angst by convincing themselves that we “think we are better than them” for wanting more for ourselves.

Your Elevating Into Actualization Spells Out Their Laziness

Setting out on this mission to become self-actualized will upset many people. Especially the ones that look just like yourself.

This destroys the excuses they have for themselves when it comes to why they aren’t commencing their own journey to realizing their own evolution.

When you set out to do the work and start to make massive progress, people who look like you, come from where you come from have no excuse as to why they can’t engage their own personal journey as well.

Thibault Penin Via Unsplash

They would rather binge watch Netflix while you grind it out to make something out of yourself.

Now, they don’t necessarily have to go out to strive to be better in any way, shape or form. They can take the position that your seeds have nothing to do with their fruit but they are aware that we’re all born with the same 24 hours to make the best of who we are.

This awareness points to a certain, current, realization about themselves, that they’re lazy. Putting your plans into action spells out their acceptance of mediocrity and it is a hard pill to swallow.

Just Plain Ole Jealousy

Sometimes we don’t know the reason why others don’t want us to be success beyond the fact that they are just plain ole jealous.

This is not one of those things that you try to spend too much time figuring out. You’re better off keeping your head down and working hard to reach your goals.

Some of this jealous does stem from you deviating from the pre-written script that many of us were given from the jump.

The script that says that we must do just enough to get by while paying a mortgage, student loan debt, raising kids and accepting misery.

Not to say that the aforementioned is akin to misery. If the typical white picket fence dream is what resonates with whomever, more power to them.

But striking out to do what makes you happy, while deviating from the pre written script is going garner a lot of haters.

In either cases, it doesn’t profit you to pay attention to any of it.


P.S. I have a podcast where I speak candidly about human nature as a whole. It would be cool if you were to check it out. It’s available on all platforms. Also, if you want to stay connected join my mailing list.

About Anthony Boyd

I go by the alias Anthony Boyd & this blog is my series of theses on philosophy, spirituality, physical expression of strength & human behavior through self-reflective spoken & written word. I’ve been a Union Delegate for 6 years. During this time I have developed countless leadership skills that I’ll be sharing with you all on this blog. Leadership is something I’ve develop through hours of research, strength training & personal application of growth strategies. I started this blog with the intention of disseminating the leadership & developments skills I’ve attained over the past 6 years as a leader because there is a huge need for male leadership. It has developed into a conduit for sharing these ideas in hopes that others can gain insight from them as well. Two things have always been constant in my three decades of life on Earth, my ability to express myself through the word & my unquenchable curiosity of everything around me. Combine that with my obsession with strength training, personal development & we have this blog. It is my hope that I can provide endless value, insight and perspective gained through experience as a leader to the readership I have developed here.

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