Personal Power is your innate ability to move through this world effectively while aligned with your purpose.
We came into this world with a purpose hard wired into our DNA.
This purpose was overridden or forgotten in the myriad of forces that conspire to pull us away.
I’m thankful to have been raised by a woman that always instilled a sense of discipline in me.
She also allowed me to express myself.
In a respectful way of course because she’s Jamaican and don’t play that shit.
With that being said, I’ve always been close to my inner voice.
I have strayed from this inner voice from time to time and when I have, bad things would happened.
But no matter what, I would always come back to it.
It took some time for me to realize what was happening.
My mother put me in church as early as 7 years old.
For 4 years I went to bible study, Sunday school as well as regular church service.
Now before you go into a panic, no I am not throwing Christianity under the bus but I sensed that something was wrong with the path I was on at the time when the pastors wife yelled:
“…and you! You’re going to go to hell!”
Pointing her old wrinkly finger at me vehemently.
She was giving a sermon.
I was probably interrupting her by speaking during.
Apparently, 11 year old me needed to be flogged with wicked words that promised fire and brimstone for eternity…for speaking during service.
I went home to tell my mother what had happened.
She did nothing.
At first I resented her for that. I felt like she didn’t stand up for me.
But later I realized it was one of the single most best things for my development of Personal Power.
I simply told her I’m not going back.
Personal power is personal and I learned this between my interaction at church that day and when I reported this incident to my mother.
From then on, at the age of 11, I made a vow to tenaciously build inner strength, personal power.
I felt helpless in that situation, I’d never feel that way again if I could help it.
That experience spurred me into action.
As I aged I became cognizant of power structures and obsessed with psychology.
I wanted to know how it all worked.
When I entered the job market I started to learn the “codes” of human conduct in relation to ones own personal power or lack thereof.
Over the years, especially during my 6 years and counting being in a leadership role as a union representative, I’ve been able to compile some notable rules.
- Never pray for life to be easy
- Respect Everyone
- Have integrity
- Be disciplined
- Get off social media
- Master your emotions
- Practice gratitude daily
- Keep a journal
- Invest in your personal development
- Work hard for yourself
- Be reticent
- Think as you wish but behave like others
- Think before you speak
- At any given time you should be building
- Be selective with friends
- Know your own weaknesses
- Know when to wage war
- Never fight with someone who has nothing to lose
- Take your time
- Be a solid man
#1 Never Pray For Life To Be Easy
If you live in a bubble you are at a huge disadvantage. Life is here for you to push up against.
When you push up against life, you become stronger. Similar to the strengthening of the bones and muscles when put under consistent pressure in strength training.
There’s this book I want to read called Antifragile: Things that gain from disorder” by Nassim Nicholas Taleb.
Essentially, this book is about how things can gain from trauma. Not necessarily the trauma that leaves one psychologically and physically impaired but the kind of trauma that makes one better.
“Some things benefit from shocks; they thrive and grow when exposed to volatility, randomness, disorder, and stressors and love adventure, risk, and uncertainty. Yet, in spite of the ubiquity of the phenomenon, there is no word for the exact opposite of fragile. According to Taleb, the opposite of fragile is antifragile. Antifragility is beyond resilience or robustness. The resilient resists shocks and stays the same; the antifragile gets better”.Antifragile: Thjngs that gain from disorder – Wikipedia
Antifragility is why you don’t want an easy life. Going through a shit ton of difficulties only serve to make you better as man.
You WANT to go through tough things because deep down you know it will make you better.
I never had an easy life.
I am grateful for this because when I look back I see how the things I’ve been through made me better.
These difficult things made me hardy and better able to handle loads of stress.
For 5 years I’ve walked to work in the middle of the night through a dangerous neighborhood, while paying rent, while going to school full time.
Anybody who is reading this and is familiar with Mount Vernon, NY knows what I’m talking about.
It is NOT a pleasant place.
This was not easy, it was down right dangerous but it made me into the man I am now.
Because of that I can offer some of these rules upfront that when applied, you WILL reap the rewards of.
#2 Respect Everyone
The same snake that eats the ants is the same snake that gets eaten by the ants-No clue who said this
Over the course of the time that I’ve been a leader I have seen other leaders rise and fall simply because of their lack of respect.
Lacking respect for individuals will get you to the top but it is short lived, my friend.
You have to know how to play with others or you WILL LOSE sooner than later.
7 years ago, right before I entered my role as a leader, I was forced to work with one of the most belligerent, arrogant managers I ever encountered.
I was harassed on a day to day basis.
I told my union representative at the time. He was too pussy to do anything about it.
I stood up for myself and fought my own battles. I didn’t let him intimidate me which lead to my learning the ropes of the union organization.
Soon the union representative lost his job. I stood up to take the position but another guy bumped me and took the role.
I ended up campaigning against him and getting the role as union steward. It was a sweet victory as I would now be able to take on the belligerent manager head to head.
This manager and I kept going head to head, he ended up getting suspended a few times then a supervisor working under him left and a new one came in.
This is when things start to turn for the worse for him. He ended up getting sick and the supervisor that came in to take the other supervisors spot, started gunning for his position.
With me applying pressure on the belligerent manager and the new supervisor gunning for his spot while being sick, he had to fold…and he did fold.
Had he been respectful and professional I am 100 percent certain that people on all sides would have vouched for him when he needed it.
Having relationships, good relationships with those you work with is important for your continued success in ANY endeavor.
It doesn’t sound attractive or cool but being respectful is a gem.
#3 Have Integrity
I don’t mean this in a moralistic sense.
Do things with conscientiousness. This means do not cut corners even though it may seem like the attractive thing to do.
Understand that “karma” is a real thing. Not so much that you are punished for the things you do but you’re punished BY the things you do.
On the flip side, you aren’t rewarded for the things you do but BY the things you do.
When you lack integrity and cut corners you WILL have it back fire on you. There is no way around this.
Do the right thing. Do right by YOU for YOU.
#4 Be Disciplined
Every man should be disciplined. Personal Power is erected from discipline of mind, emotions and physicality.
True power comes from restraint. Your ability to restrain yourself in any situation that requires mental energy is directly proportional to the amount of Personal Power you exude.
Being disciplined enough to work hard and stay focused allows for you to build personal power through concentration and raw effort.
I give it to you like this. Discipline is sheer exercise of the WILL power.
Personal Power ultimately comes from how strong your WILL power is.
#5 Get Off Of Social Media
Unless you have a business or a personal brand going, leave social media alone.
Get off social media.
Besides the fact that mindless scrolling drains your will power, social media facilitates a false sense of power and importance.
No matter how many “followers” you gain, you are not that important.
Social media is a virtual reality. It is not real.
You must gain personal power in real life and provide value to others.
When you do this, you have something substantial to bring to social media.
But this is not before you actually LIVE LIFE.
Another issue with social media for most people is that it is addicting. Addiction robs you of your personal power. Addiction zaps your will power.
Your hands are cuffed and you’re not able to do any meaningful work in life.
Remember, your personal power is attached to the unique purpose you were born with.
#6 Master Your Emotions
“You Will Continue To Suffer If You Have an Emotional Reaction To Everything”– I have no idea who said this.
At one point in my life I had to read this 100 times.
I am a Scorpio so being emotional by nature is a struggle.
Learn to master your emotions. When you master your emotions there is nothing anyone can do to you.
You have complete control over how you react to circumstances , not circumstances themselves.
Staying calm, as reasonably possible, will help to keep your judgement from being clouded.
When you can keep your mind clear of any emotional obstructions, your personal power is easily accessible.
You’re able to anchor yourself in wisdom that springs from conscious awareness.
This is your divine right.
Remember that people will try to get you to react in an emotional way in order to knock you off your square.
Don’t let them.
#7 Practice Gratitude Daily
There’s going to come a time when you will have some rough days.
Gratitude puts things into perspective for you no matter how rough things get.
It is 100% profitable to be positive in any situation that seeks to pull you down.
Perspective is everything.
Having gratitude is a great perspective to have.
Focusing on everything you have to be grateful for is a great way to add MORE things to be grateful for.
Your Personal Power grows as you exercise gratitude because you are in direct alignment with divine energy.
Stop reading this right now and think of everything you have to be grateful for…I’ll be here when you get back.
#8 Keep A Journal
The first thing that came to mind when I wrote this heading is a book by the name of Meditations by Marcus Aurelius.
Marcus Aurelius was an Roman emperor from 161 to 180.
He kept a journal that he called “Meditations.” Marcus did not intend to have this journal read but it contains many truths that resonate into this era.
Marcus was the most powerful man in Rome at the time he reigned.
Despite being the most powerful, he kept a journal probably to keep himself balanced and sane.
If it was good enough for the most powerful man in Rome, it’s good enough for you.
Keeping a journal and free associating allows for you to keep your mind free of clutter.
A man with personal power is free from mental clutter.
This allows for you to access personal power on a MENTAL level.
#9 Invest In Your Personal Development
The number asset you have is yourself.
Read books, lift weights, meditate.
You want to do all of these things as an investment into yourself. If you want to gain personal power, you have to invest in the most important asset you have! YOURSELF.
You’re going to notice that when you develop yourself you attract more favorable circumstances.
Investment in yourself means you will make a few enemies. But if you’re not making any enemies, you’re not doing anything in life.
In a nutshell you’ll start to notice people treat you differently, whether it’s good or bad, it’s all good.
#10 Work Hard For Yourself
I can tell you from experience, working hard for someone else as oppose to for yourself is demoralizing.
Working hard for someone else is guaranteed to have you taken for granted.
The only one that’s going to appreciate your hard work is yourself.
You want to do meaningful work that you can be proud of not work that is going to ultimately make someone else rich.
#11 Be Reticent
There’s no use in running your mouth so much that you can’t hear your own self think.
When you learn to keep your mouth shut you get quiet in your mind.
The ideas you have about things you want o accomplish will grow and grow and grow. It’s better not to speak about them at all. Keep them to your self.
When you speak about your ideas too frequently, people will shoot them down with rabid tenacity.
This can be demoralizing for you.
Let the power in your mind build rather than carelessly spreading them all over the place.
Personal Power comes from restraint of not only emotions but the tongue as well.
#12 Think As You Wish But Behave Like Others
This is a rendition of Law 38 in the 48 laws of power by Robert Greene.
I decided to add this to the rules because it’s important that you go with the flow until you can break from the pack.
Learn everything you can from the group for as long as possible so that you know exactly how NOT to be.
Personal Power comes from being different even in the wake of a herd mentality but it also comes from blending in and knowing what NOT to be.
Move within the group for as long as it builds up enough resentment for you to say
“Fuck this. That’s enough. I can’t roll with this people any more.”
From there you will know everything you need to do NOT to be like them.
#13 Think Before You Speak
This is a whole craft in of itself.
People these days are in constant reactive mode.
They tend to REACT instead of RESPOND.
If you want a real example of what it looks like to respond instead of reacting, to think before you speak, watch this interview with Joe Rogan and Elon Musk.
Every time Joe asked an important question, Elon made sure he sat quietly, thought about his response then carefully responded.
Thinking before you speak allows for you to give cogent answers.
This habit wires your brain to think efficiently rather than lhelter skelter.”
You’ll be more clear headed and less anxious because you are sure of the responses you give.
#14 At Any Given Time, You Should Be Building
A man should always be building something.
We are creatures of edification.
There’s nothing that builds our Personal Power more than BUILDING a project of our own.
It doesn’t matter what you building as long as you are building.
You can be building a business, a house, a shed, a workbench, a video game, a piece of technology…something.
Building is hugely beneficial to your mental health as well as edification of Personal Power.
You’ll get use to manifesting through visualization then going right to work on your project.
#15 Be Selective With Friends
Choose your friends wisely.
It is important that you put together an inner circle that is good for your Personal Power. These people should be building you up when you are down and you should be doing the same for them.
Picking the wrong group of friends could put you at risk of have toxicity in your circle.
This can mean that you will never build Personal Power because you’re at the whim of narcissistic individuals bent on sapping you of vital energy.
Your inner circle will make of break you.
#16 Know Your Weaknesses
If you don’t know your weaknesses and someone else does, you’re liable to meet defeat at some point.
Until you’re able to plug all the chinks in your armor, you will be at risk for never achieving lasting Personal Power.
Some people say focus only on strengths but when you do that you leave huge blind spots of vulnerability else where.
Vulnerability that can shed some light on some valuable insights into your personal development.
Finding your weaknesses is simple, you can ask others in your inner circle.
If you have chosen them wisely, they will be keen at telling you like it is, no sugar coating.
#17 Know When To Wage War
There’s a time and place for everything.
No this isn’t a little spiel about keeping your mouth shut in the face of wickedness.
You have to STAND UP FOR YOURSElf and stop being a pussy.
I do it time and time again and my Personal Power builds and builds.
If you want true Personal Power, you have to be willing to go war with not only your mind, but others.
On this journey to Personal Power you will have people who don’t like you for no apparent reason.
These people will swear up and down that you ain’t shit.
It’s not about proving THEM wrong, it’s about proving YOURSELF right.
And when you go to war, no matter the turn out, win or lose, make yourself a HARD motherfucker to contend with.
#18 Never War With Someone Who Has Nothing To Lose
This kind of person is not worth going at it with.
They have nothing to offer you besides necessary headache.
Quite frankly they are a waste of your fucking time.
They people will always be miserable and never seek any kind of lasting happiness in their lives because they’re LOST.
They have nothing to lose because they haven’t realized the divinity within themselves.
Oh well, they’ve given in and sold themselves short.
They have nothing to lose because they haven’t gained insight into their purpose.
And you don’t want to waste not one minute going back and forth with these losers.
Going back and forth with people like this takes you off your path and you lose sight of your goals.
Your vital energy gets sapped and when this happens you lose touch with your Personal Power.
We spoke about how important it is to control your emotions. It applies here.
Control your emotions and never fight with anyone who has nothing to lose.
#19 Take Your Time
Haste makes waste. And when you are constantly rushing through everything you do you tend to make mistakes.
Often times these mistakes can make us feel down and often question our self worth.
When we take our time and do the best we can, we do better work and we become empowered by it.
This rule goes hand in hand with building. You always want to be building but you always want to be taking your time to build something. Your self worth depends on executing it properly.
#20 Be A Solid Man
When I say “Be A Solid Man” I mean to embody all of the above rules but to also be a MAN OF YOUR WORD.
A man is NOTHING without his word.
In this day and age we have so many self-proclaimed men running around. They are not solid men because they are not men of their word.
It is so easy for men to scramble at the drop of a hat.
When I say “Be A Solid Man” I mean to embody authenticity. Be yourself NO MATTER WHAT. There is nothing worth more in this world than your soul.
Many people will try to take it from you but it is imperative you stay your true self and never give up your soul.
Life may be hard this way.
You will become Antifragile because you chose to stay solid and follow these rules.
Until next time